An Unlikely Hero
by The Blind Assassin
Summary: The night before his Ordeal, Joren of Stone Mountain goes missing. Years later, after Tortall has been conquered and destroyed, Joren reappears in Kel's life, asking for her help *UPDATED 8-8*
1. Chamber whispers

An Unlikely Hero: Part 1

Disclaimer: As much as I'd love to have Joren chained to my bedposts, everything but the plot belongs to Ms. Tamora Pierce and her publishers. In short, don't sue me. Thank you kindly. 

Rating: PG-13

Summary: The night before his Ordeal, Joren of Stone Mountain goes missing. Six years later, after Tortall has been conquered by a Carthaki dictator, Kel is rebuilding her shattered life when Joren reappears asking for her help. (hopefully will also feature Daine and Kaddar in a major way)

A/N: Well, look at poor ambitious me! Starting a new fic when Fallen Idols is just coming to a climax? Tsk tsk, I know. But this just popped into my head, and while I've had K/J plots bubbling around and developing for quite sometime, this one just seemed quick and easy to write while I was stuck with FI. To do this, I was forced to reread the part of SQUIRE when J dies and it was _quite_ traumatizing, so I hope you like it. Anyway, its only a short beginning, but please tell me what you think. – T.B.A.

*

Joren of Stone Mountain knelt quietly in the same place hundreds of squires had spent countless hours brooding about the Ordeal in it's chapel. Unlike the majority of his year-mates, he had never before come to sit in the Chapel of Ordeal until that day. And the next day he would enter the Chamber and become a knight. 

_It's about time_, he thought to himself with a chuckle. _Four years of abuse from The Stump and another three playing lackey to Paxton. And all for what?_ He found himself asking. _A Shield? A life of service to a King I don't respect and an obligation to a code of chivalry I couldn't care less about?_

Joren closed his eyes and sighed. It felt as if all his life he was doing nothing but what he was told to do by others. _Go to the palace and become a page. Bully the girl. Accept the position of squire to Lord Nond. Propose to Lady Rosalind. Pass your Ordeal. _

Well, he'd be a knight by this time the next day. And he'd marry the girl his father had chosen by the end of the year. And then his father would leave him alone. And that's all he wanted, really. He may love the art of fighting, but he could care less about being a knight. 

Refusing to feel sorry for himself, he sighed again and stood, walking up to the doors of the revered Chamber. _What's the big deal anyway?_ He thought, sniggering. _It's just a room, really, and I'm a better warrior than so many of my fellow squires. Why are they all so scared?_

He'd seen the girl squire here just days ago, kneeling silently as he had just minutes ago. She had reason to be afraid—even if his bullying, Wyndlon's tough training, and the border patrol hadn't destroyed her, surely the chamber would. He grinned cockily and traced a finger over the carved door of the Chamber of Ordeal. 

Sir Paxton carried a tall, thin body in his arms as he came down the steps in front of the chamber. White-blond hair cascaded over the front of the head, covering a face—a face he recognized when the hair was brushed away to reveal skin that was even paler than usual. Pale as death. Someone was screaming in the background—shrieking inconsolably. Gasps and cries of some emotion—surprise, perhaps—broke out all over the chapel. 

_Dead._

Joren his hand pulled away from door with a gasp for breath. His heart was pounding a mile a minute. He squeezed his eyes shut and breathed deeply. _In. Out. In. Out. _

Somehow, against his will, he leaned forward and touched the door again. 

His father was smashing through a door, yelling and banging like a maniac. His mother was clinging to him, begging, it seemed, and his uncle was behind them. "Bitch!" he heard his father's voice yell with rage, and a dog was barking and biting his father—and were those—birds? He recognized the dog as the ugly mutt Keladry was often trailed by. "Trollop, you killed my boy!" his father yelled into the dark.

Next he knew, his mother was speaking to Lord Raoul, "He is distraught," her voice broke, "My Lord, please, Burchard is out of his mind with grief."

"My nephew is dead," his uncle cried wildly, "The Chamber of Ordeal opened on his corpse!"

Joren finally was able to yank himself away from the doors. He stared in horror at the grand Chamber doors for a moment and then bolted from the Chapel of Ordeal without even closing the doors. 

*

Sir Paxton sat with Joren's other knight's mentor, Sir Deric, waiting for his squire to join them after his ceremonial bath so that the young man could begin his vigil before the Ordeal. 

"Joren sure is taking a long time in there, don't you think, Deric?" The knight asked his companion. 

The larger man shrugged. "Leave him for a little while longer," the knight advised, "He's probably just working out his nerves."

Sir Paxton snickered to himself. He'd rarely seen any trace of nervousness in his reserved, yet cocky squire, and didn't expect him to be nervous at all about his Ordeal in the least. And until that morning, he hadn't thought the boy to be nervous at all. True, all day the boy had been even paler than usual, and quiet even when spoken to, but he attributed that to a realization of the gravity of the Ordeal. 

"I don't think Joren is capable of being nervous, Deric." Paxton said after a moment. 

Deric sighed and shook his head. "He is quite confident and seems in control. He will make quite a knight, from what I've seen, once if his nasty streak of animosity is ever overcome." 

"So even you've seen that side, then?" Paxton asked, raising an eyebrow to Sir Deric. 

"Somewhat." He answered. The other knight knew very little of Joren, having only seen him at the young man's home in Stone Mountain and several times at court when he was visiting. He was a close friend of his father, Lord Burchard, but had still heard of and even witnessed some of the boy's callous behavior. "I've heard more then I've seen of Burchard's son in actuality." He confessed.

"He's not a bad kid, really." Sir Paxton offered in defense of his squire. After few more moments of silence, Joren's knight master said, "Nerves or no, that boy is taking much to long in there." 

"Go call to him, then."

Sir Paxton rose and did just that. When there was no answer, and no splashing noises—in fact, no noises at all—coming from the room with the pool, Sir Paxton called out again, and then stepped cautiously inside. 

He grimaced after a moment. There was no doubt about it. Joren of Stone Mountain was gone. 

*


	2. On a Darkling Plain

****

An Unlikely Hero 

A/N: Now who would have guessed I'd be updating THIS? I believe it's been more than 6 months since I updated it. OOOPS. Well, I am. I'm afraid this is a very "necessary" chapter, and has is rather sad and boring. Even so, it's something. And no, this won't be a K/N, as far as I anticipate, even though it may seem that way, since he's in the chapter a whole lot. Special thanks to **Farah (ThePenMage)** for going over this chapter for its many errors before I posted—and I changed a few things since she sent it back to me, so any further errors are solely my fault. And yes, this has nothing to do with the first part. It will sooner or later, I promise.

Part II: On a Darkling Plain 

Daine unlocked the door to her and Numair's rooms and stepped sleepily inside, stifling a yawn as she did so. She had spent all day with the riders and had returned—exhausted—to find Numair busy in the midst of some very important experiment. She had left him to his work, and now all she wanted was to collapse in a soft bed and sleep for days. 

But before she could do this, she found on her table a small letter bearing the Carthaki Royal Seal. She hadn't heard from Emperor Kaddar in months now! Smiling, she picked it up and carefully opened it. 

__

Dearest Daine, 

My apologies for having been so long in responding to your last letter. I am afraid things here in Carthak are presently not as pleasant as I would have hoped. Do you remember when you warned me about the continuation of slavery in my empire? I had told you that I needed to take these changes little by little, but I see now that the changes in that particular arena should have been handled before I even thought of anything else. Now I am facing massive riots and the serious threat of a full on rebellion, but cannot do anything about because my council refuses to budge. And to think! The council was my own creation, and it is holding me back!

But in any case, I shouldn't worry you with such things. I do hope everything in your life is as it was when you wrote me last. My council is incessantly trying to find me a wife, and I suppose I have put off obtaining one for long enough. They say your Princess Kalasin is a real gem. Perhaps a Tortallan-Carthaki alliance wouldn't be too much of a stretch? I'm only teasing, Daine. Don't you go asking your king to have his daughter engaged to me just yet!

I do hope your friends are all well—animal and human alike. Lady Alanna, I know, must be thrilled; I've heard that Tortall's second lady knight was given her shield. In any case, give my regards to your mage as well, and take care of yourself. 

Warm regards, 

Kaddar 

Daine yawned again and set the letter down. She'd reply to it whenever she woke up. For now, sleep was beckoning to her with much too much force for her to resist.

* * * 

****

2 years later 

Daine unsuccessfully attempted to tuck in her shirt and slide on her shoes at the same, panicking because she was late to her monthly meeting with King Jonathan. She had just pulled on her tunic and grabbed her keys to leave when Numair walked in looking grave and closed the door behind him. Daine stopped despite her rush and looked at him with concern. 

"Daine," he said softly, "Don't worry about your meeting. It has been cancelled."

"What—"

"Thak's Gate was taken over at dawn this morning." He said grimly. "The imperial palace was ransacked and burned by a rebel warlord called Tarigue from South Carthak." Daine stood staring in shock. Her Emperor friend had written of escalating troubles, riots, and rebellions, but had made it sound controllable. And the King'swarnings of possible trouble in Carthak had seemed so vague!

"Kaddar—"

"If I'm not mistaken, Lindhall and the emperor left the palace in secret just last night." He told her. "Magelet, I don't know what is going on exactly, but I do know that Kaddar is _still _alive."

"Oh gods!" Daine murmured, holding her hand out to Numair, who took it and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "What will Tortall do with this new warlord--?"

Numair pursed his lips. "Jonathan's had everyone gearing up for something like this for a while, only I don't think he thought it so serious until today. General Tarigue's army is stronger than we had imagined. Jonathan's biggest fear is that now he's controlled Carthak, he won't keep his hands to himself."

"He thinks there will be an invasion?"

Numair nodded. Daine rubbed the bridge of her nose and pinched her eyes shut. This was not good. Not good at all. 

* * *

****

4 months later

Keladry of Mindelan yawned into her sleeve, trying her best to keep sleep from taking over. She looked enviously at Jump, who slept peacefully at her ankles, before scanning the horizon again. 

"Since when did one of Tortall's commanders start doing sentry duty?" she heard a voice echo from behind her. 

A wry smile crossed her face before she turned to look at her best friend. "Since this commander suffered a blow to her shoulder that even _you _couldn't heal." It was so dark that she could just barely see his face in the torchlight until he came and sat next to her. 

"Mithros, I haven't seen in you months now." He said, pursing his lips together and studying her face. Kel did the same, noting that he looked tired and somber. She tore her eyes away from his sad ones, not wanting to believe that her ever-cheery Neal had been broken by this war as well. 

"It's good to see you again, Neal." She said, squeezing his hand. "How are Yuki and your little rascal?"

"Fine." He said. "She and Justin have gone to the Yamanis. It's safer there, and Queenscove is currently being evacuated anyway."

"Goddess, that is serious! Is the rest of your family all right?"

"Yes, of course." He said somberly. He looked down at his hands for a moment, pursing his lips tight. Kel was about to ask him what was wrong, when he abruptly looked up at her and said, "Kel, I have to be the bearer of horrible news for a moment." Kel's chest constricted. "They would have sent Dom, but he is up North, and—"

"What is it, Neal." Kel interrupted, voice shaky.

He sighed, taking her hands in his. "Mindelan was attacked three days ago—all survivors of noble decent have been seized, the rest are moving toward the camps. Conal is at Fort Groten, but everyone else—" he stopped, knowing that she had heard enough.

Kel opened her mouth, but no sound came out. Finally, she closed it and opened it again and a choking gasp emerged. Neal held her as the sobs came. 

* * * 

"But why did they kill Lady's family, my Lord? Why didn't they let them go to the camps with all the other people from Mindelan?" Kel heard Tobe ask from outside the tent. 

"General Tarigue claims to be working for the people, Tobe." Neal's voice answered soberly. "He gained support in Carthak because he told all the slaves that he would free them, and now he's getting people to help him by telling them that if they kill all the nobles, they can have more money and power."

"But he's _killing _the people, not helping them." Tobe answered angrily. "What a shithead."

"Hey, I heard that, young man." Kel said sternly as she opened the tent flap. "You've been hanging around the foot soldiers too much. I don't want to hear you cursing like that again."

"Sorry, Lady." Tobe said. Usually, he would have given her some of his ever-increasing cheek, but since Neal had arrived with the news, everyone treated her like she was about to break. 

_Which I am._ Kel thought, _But I sure as hell don't want everyone else to know that._

"How's your shoulder, Kel?" Neal asked, rising from his seat on her bed. 

"Better, since you've been healing it." She said.

"Let's see it again—" he began, wanting to do another healing, but Kel shook her head. 

"My shoulder is fine, Neal. Save your energy for the healing tent. You'll be needed." Kel clenched her jaw. "There's news of another legion of Carthaki soldiers heading in our direction. They'll be here by dawn." Though the camp was one of the strongest Tortall had, the battle would undoubtedly be hard.

Neal pursed his lips. "Mithros help us." He said after a moment of silence. 

"I wish My Lord Raoul was here. And I wish Dom and his squad were here too." Tobe said with a scowl. "No offense to you, my Lord," he said to Neal. "But they always make Lady feel a bit easier too."

"No offense taken, boy." Neal said, ruffling Tobe's already tousled hair. "They're both down farther south, where they're desperately needed. Now go get your Lady's armor ready."

"All right." Tobe said with a sigh. "Oh, Lady?" he asked as he was leaving the tent. 

"Yes?"

"Can I ride Bonecrusher into battle?"

"Absolutely not! Tobe, you are _not _going into battle at all. You are going to stay safely in the healers tent, offering your help when it is needed _there_."

"But—"

"No buts, I am serious." Tobe rolled his eyes at her before exiting the tent sulkily. Kel sighed. 

"Bonecrusher?" Neal asked, amused. 

"I bought him a horse." Kel said with a smile. "Needless to say, he named it. I was just happy that he didn't call it something vulgar."

Neal grinned. "Aww, he's a good kid, Kel."

"I know." She said, biting her lip. "He's been through so much at such a young age, though. Two wars just since he's been with me, and so much abuse as a child. And I worry about him, with all this." She waved her arm upward, implying the camp, and war in general. "A war camp is no place for a growing boy."

"Well, if we don't win this war, there won't be a single place in Tortall suited for a child to grow up in. Just remember that." Neal said.

The horn from the main tent sounded, calling the soldiers to report to their commanders. "Well, here's our chance. Take care of yourself out there, Neal."

He drew her into a loose embrace. "You too, Kel."

* * * 

__

Eleven. Kel truly felt like hurling, but kept on calling out orders, running on pure adreniline. _That's eleven of my men, dead._

Her long sword felt like lead in her hand as she wielded it on, yelling at her men as she held off a Carthaki horseman with her sword. The clash of their blades was lost in the war cries and sounds of death all around them. The last cry of the man she fought before she ran her sword clear through him, too, was only heard by her.

__

Twelve, Thirteen. She noted as she turned in her saddle to survey her command. As she turned back to face forward, an arrow hit her. Kel stared at her upper arm for a moment, watching the blood spread on the cloth between the armor on her chest and forearms. Her vision went blurry and she was sure that she would loose her consciousness when a loud, "Keladry!" drew her attention upward again. 

She jolted her head upward so quickly that her head spun, but instinctively, brought her shield up and weakly blocked the blow of a huge ax. She had caught the man's hands above their heads with her shield, and drew her sword up with her other arm to drive it into his side.

As she finished him off, three of her men surrounded her and she drew back into the group of Tortallan soldiers. She headed back towards Wyldon, the commander of the entire camp.

"Mindelan, get your men out!" Wyldon called to her. "Get them out, now!"

"But, sir—"

"I said _now_!" 

Kel turned back to her commandees as Wyldon rode off. "Men, draw back! Draw back!" she yelled. "Crawford, Elberg, get out now! I SAID NOW!!" Just as the she was calling back the last of her men, a soft trembling began from the ground below them. Peachblossom reared backard in fear, as did most the horses of the retreating men around her. "Retreat, retreat!" Kel cried furiously, afraid that some foreign sorcery was afoot.

A horn sounded from behind them and a Tortallan rider with a white flag emerged in the distance. 

The soldiers in front of them sounded a loud cheer, and Kel and her men drew back in disappointment. As they retreated towards the camp, one of her soldiers rounded her off. "Why did you call us back!" he asked angrily, "We could have held out! This camp could have held out!"

"Orders." She said grimly. 

"Orders my ass! Even you aren't stupid enough to believe we were completely lost back there!"

"Get out of my way, Thompson." Kel said firmly. 

"Give me a decent answer and I will." The stubborn older man countered. 

"I followed my orders, Sergeant." She said in a loud voice. "Now move!"

Sergeant Thompson shook his head and spit at the ground in front of her. "I suppose we can't expect anything but surrender from a woman."

"You have been dismissed!" Kel yelled angrily. "Not a word of disobedience out of you again, unless you want your position terminated, Sergeant." He turned and nudged his horse forward in reluctant obedience. "Back to the camp, everyone! We are still in a war here!" Kel called to the soldiers. 

As they were returning to the camp, the earth shook again—only this time, more violently. One of her men was thrown completely off his horse as the rest struggled to stay on horseback. Shouts and cries of terror erupted all around her, but thankfully, the earth did not move again.

When they arrived back at the camp, everyone who was relatively unwounded was bustling around in an effort to understand what was happening. Kel headed straight for the healers tent—which, amazingly enough, was still inexistence—to look for Tobe and Neal.

Relief flooded her when she saw Neal's tall figure leaning over a bed, but couldn't find Tobe anywhere amid the bustling people. Neal was in the middle of healing a serious wound, so had to wait to inquire after the boy. Two men she recognized from her time with the Own were carried out of the tent among the many who just couldn't be saved. Finally, it was Neal who found her at the tent's opening. 

"Goddess, Kel! Thank Mithros you're all right!" he said, "Is that wound serious?" he asked, looking at her hastily bandaged arm.

"Where's Tobe?" she asked him, ignoring his question.

"I sent him to fetch water when the worst of the wounded were coming in a few minutes ago." He said. "I came in here after the second hour of battle, and have been here since. He was here that whole time."

"I've got to go find him." Kel said. "If Wyldon comes around looking for me, tell him I'll come to the main tent as soon as I can."

"Kel—" Neal stopped her by grabbing her wrist. "Wyldon called you and your men back for a very important reason. I'm sure that he wants to see all the commanders as soon as possible."

"What—"

"I don't know what it is, but we all felt the earthquakes. All of us gifted ones can _feel _a difference. That probably means—" he stopped, grimacing. 

Kel shut her eyes. They all knew what problems that deep in the earth meant, even if nothing of the sort had happened in either of their lifetimes. "All right, I'll head to the main camp first." She said. "Tell Tobe to stay put when he gets back, _please_."

"Of course." Neal called after her as she headed out of the busy tent. He had to get back to healing, but had the unexplainable urge to call her back. He couldn't say why, but he had an odd feeling that he would never see her again.

* * * 

"Corus has been taken. The Queen has been murdered. The King is in very bad shape. They have the Dominion Jewel." Wyldon's deep voice said emotionlessly to his commanders. "We had no choice but to surrender." He continued. "All Tortallan armies elsewhere have been defeated. We who have survived must now deal with life according to their rules. We have very little time before we are all seized and taken to prisons. We have lost more then half of the men we had with us this morning at this camp. We will all be arrested and taken to prisons, but because of our surrender, they have promised that they will perform no excecutions. It has been an honor fighting for this wonderful country with all of you. Good day."

__

What he is leaving unsaid, Kel thought grimly, _is that there is no hope. Tortall is lost._


	3. A Rusting Sword

A/N: Finally updating again! Well, here's a short, boring chapter. I hope you all realize that this IS going to be getting somewhere eventually, even if it doesn't seem like it at all. If you don't understand anything, it's alright. I'll try to clarify later. Feel free to ask questions in your reviews; I'll address them in the next chapter either in the text or in a note. I didn't have anyone beta this, mainly because i wasn't planning on posting it, but I was itching to post for some reason. Anyway, thanks for reading!

__

Part III: A Rusting Sword

6 years after the invasion of Tortall 

* * *

"Get outta bed, you're wastin' yer birthin' day!" Elsie's commanding voice sounded through the door as she continued to bang on it.

Tobe jolted out of bed with a start, bumping his head on the empty bunk above him. "Shit." He muttered to himself, pulling his shirt on with a yawn before moving to open the door. 

"Happy birthday, little man!" the plump innkeeper said, grinning at his sleep-filled eyes and mussed hair. "You're eighteen years ol' today, did ye forget?"

"No, Aunt Elsie, how could I 'ave forgotten with folk like ye 'roud here to remind me at this time o' the mornin'?" Tobe said dryly. 

"Oh, hush, boy. We let ye sleep in this mornin in honor of it!" 

"Much 'preciated." He said with a yawn. 

"Now I'll let ye wash yerself up an then ye come down n see what I've made ye to break yer fast." Elsie said. 

"A-right, I'll be sure an' do that." 

As Elsie closed the door and left him to his morning grooming, Tobe yawned and pulled some clean clothes out from his chest. He knew what Elsie had prepared for him—just like every year for the passed five years, she would have made hotcakes with maple syrup, fluffy eggs and a fresh loaf of her famous nut bread.

In truth, it really wasn't his birthday. And in truth, he really didn't know if he was eighteen or sixteen or nineteen or seventeen. Keladry had just named this day—the day she had met him eight years ago—his honorary birthday. And every year, Aunt Elsie made him a huge birthday breakfast, her husband Joseph took him to the leather maker and bought him a new pair of shoes, and Keladry gave him something that was essential to a warrior.

When he had finally made his way down to the kitchen, everyone had gotten to work but Keladry and Elsie herself. 

"Mornin', sleepy head." Kel said with a slight smile. 

"Mornin' Kel." Tobe replied sleepily. 

"Go on and give your sister a hug, little man," Elsie told him. "I'm sure she got a great big gift fer ye this year, but you've gotta earn it."

Kel laughed and hugged her reluctant young friend tightly. "I know you hate hugs, Tobe, but I won't bite." She whispered before releasing him. 

"I know, I know." He said, rolling his eyes before grabbing a plate from the cabinet and heading over towards the stove for his meal. 

A faint grin passed over Kel's face, observing her growing ward with mixed emotions. Tobe was growing up quickly. He was now taller then she was, still thin despite all the food Elsie had stuffed him with over the last few years. He had that same boyish look that he always had, and she was still always hauling him out of trouble all over the busy city of Port Caynn. But even so, he was growing up in this new world—a world without knights, without a king, without the Own and without the chivalry of the world she had known. And it warmed her heart to see that he wasn't coming out so badly either.

"Keladry, honey, they're sayin' there's two shipful of men comin' into the port this night." Elsie said, dragging her from her thoughts. "They say they're ships from Carthak, so we're gon'need lotsa help servin' tonight."

"All right." Kel replied with a sigh. Ships from Carthak usually brought either soldiers or traders, both rude and unwelcome in Kel's mind. 

Kel glanced over at Tobe before heading out the door. He looked up at her with a devlish look in his eyes, and then smiled to reveal the peel of an orange slice wedged between his lips. 

Kel rolled her eyes, but laughed despite herself. Tobe never failed in making them all smile.

* * *

Joren unhooked the clasp to his cloak as he entered the inn, soaked to the bone by the downpour that hadn't ceased since he had left Corus three days ago. The inn was crowded and dark, and he had a sinking feeling that this one would be full as well. People seemed to fill every corner of this inn's main room, mingling beneath the haze from smoke and torchlight that hovered over the room. He pushed through the swarm of people until he reached the bar. 

"How can I help ye this evenin'?" he heard the woman behind the counter say in a cheery voice.

"How do you think you can help me? This is an inn, isn't it?" He retorted brusquely. "I need a room." He added, letting his bad mood get the best of him. It wasn't until the woman dropped her pad of paper and pencil on the bar with frustration that he actually looked at her. 

"We don't have rooms here for arrogant sons of bitches." She said matter-of-factly, staring him down with dangerously cold hazel eyes. "Who's next?"

As he was pushed aside by other customers, his mouth literally dropped open. He hadn't seen the girl for over ten years—but she didn't seem to have changed much from that stubborn girl of fifteen. True, she was now softer around the edges, more feminine, and looked much older—but she had the same brown hair, hazel eyes and that same ever-cool demeanor. He couldn't believe he hadn't recognized her right away.

"Mindelan?" he managed to ask in a voice of utter disbelief, pushing his way back to the area in front of her. "You're alive?"

"I _could _ask the same of you, Stone Mountain." She called over her shoulder as she filled four tankards of ale and set them on the bar for her customers. Her ease and coordination told him that she had been working there for quite some time. "We'd all thought you'd dropped off the face of the earth after you disappeared." He shrugged. "It's a shame you haven't." she said as she turned towards a rack of keys behind her and removed one. Joren winced slightly, having forgotten exactly how much she hated him. Or rather, how much they had hated one another.

"So you're working as a barmaid now? That's not surprising, I knew you'd live up to your full potential." He replied, not wanting to be outdone by her snippety remarks.

Kel turned towards him and slammed the key loudly down onto the bar. "Have a nice night." She said before turning and walking over to the other end of the bar, leaving Joren to think about at this brief, chance meeting with a forgotten enemy.

* * *

"Hey, Kel, who's that gent you were talkin' to before? Do you know 'im?" Tobe asked her about an hour later when things had begun to calm down. 

"Who?" she asked quickly, wanting to avoid the question. Tobe, who was now at least seventeen years old, was persistently interested in her life before the Carthaki invasion. 

"That blond one on the end of the bar there."

"Who, Joren? Oh. He was a few years ahead of me at the palace." 

"So he's a knight like you?"

"I never said that." She said brusquely, ignoring him as best she could. The last thing she wanted to do was to relive the bad part of her training with Tobe now, when there was no use even thinking about the past.

"Kel, I know you don't like talkin' bout those days, but—"

"Just forget about it, Tobe!" Kel snapped, raising her voice slightly. "No good can come of this now. Especially not through him."

"Oh, all right then!" Tobe returned, matching her tone with an annoyed one of his own. "Mithros, Kel, ye don't 'ave t'be so moody 'bout things all the time! I was just askin' a question."

"Yes, well some questions are best left unasked." She told him quietly. 

"Aye, all right then." Tobe sighed, respectful of her wishes not to talk about the past yet frustrated all the same. 

But when Kel left him alone to get back to the customers, he eyed the blond man sitting in the corner with curiosity anyway. The man was relatively tall, lean but muscular, with hair so pale it glowed in the dim light of the tavern. Though his skin was quite pale, a scar that had healed to a color as white as snow sat dauntingly across the end of his left eyebrow. He looked tough and weathered as any warrior would, but Tobe knew instinctively that he was a lone warrior who would not easily respond to his many questions. 

Tobe looked back at Kel, silently asking for her pardon even though he didn't know why it felt so wrong that he should talk to this man, and then took a deep breath. 

Tobe cleared his throat before sitting down at the stool across from the blonde. "Good day, sir," Tobe said politely. "I'm Tobe, Keladry's brother. You do know her, don't you?"

"Keladry was the last of the Mindelans." He said in a monotonous voice without looking up from his drink. 

"So, you knew the Mindelans? Before the—" he stopped, expecting him to understand what he meant. 

"I knew her when she was a squire." Joren said quickly, sipping his drink as he tried to ignore the boy he had no concern with. "What's it to you, kid?"

"Well, as you know I'm _not _her brother. I'm her—well, she sorta took me in during the Scanran war when I was 'bout ten year old. Lived with her in refugee camps and then at the palace for a while. Before the invasion. She treats me like her brother, though, since her family's gone."

The man looked up at Tobe, his curiosity now sparked. "You lived at the palace?"

"For a year or two." Tobe replied. "I had hoped to join the riders."

"It's a shame you didn't get the chance." He then paused, as if he were deciding whether it was even worth continuing the conversation. "My name's Joren, by the way." He said finally. "I never made it to knighthood, so don't think I'm anything special." Joren then pulled at the cuff of his left sleeve, raising the material casually so that the skin on the inside of his wrist was visable. 

Tobe's eyes widened when he saw the tiny black tattoo of a lioness on the pale skin of this stranger. He stared at Joren with a look of pure excitement. "You're a member of the Pride?" Tobe asked in a hushed voice.

Joren grinned slightly—thoughtlessly, almost—at the boy's reaction, wondering briefly if he had been that easy to read when he was his age. "What do you know of the Pride?"

"Enough to know that I should be in Corus, trying to become a member of the Pride as we speak."

Joren raised an eyebrow. "And why aren't you?"

Tobe rolled his eyes. "Kel." He said bitterly. "I don't understand, she used to want to do anything for Tortall's sake. Now, she'll have nothing to do with it. Any talk of life before the invasion and she shuts off all together. And if I even mention the Pride and she goes completely mad. And—" Tobe paused, looking a bit sheepish. "Well, as much as I want to go to Corus, I can't leave her, and there's no way she would ever come."

Joren pursed his lips, thinking. "So she wants to forget her life before the war."

Tobe nodded. "She lost so much, you know? I try not to blame 'er." Tobe waited for Joren to reply, but the older man was deep in thought, and said nothing. Finally, feeling somewhat awkward, Tobe spoke again. "What brings ye to Port Caynn?"

Joren looked back sharply at Tobe, eyes focusing on him with a suddeness Tobe found unsettling. "Do you know Lord Raoul?"

"Of course. He was her knight master."

"Yes." Joren said. "His niece and nephew are coming in from the Imperial University of Carthak tomorrow morning, and I'm too pick them up."

"Nobles? At the Carthaki University? I thought—"

"Don't be ridiculous." Joren snapped. "His sister married beneath her station and her children were common-born. Tarigue's men would never allow nobles—or ex-nobles, at this point—to even live freely, let alone study at the most prestigious University in the empire. After all—" 

"I see you've met my old _friend_." Kel, who had suddenly appeared beside Tobe, said wryly. "Elsie needs you to see about an unruly horse in the second stable, Tobe. And she's not in the mood for your complainin' either, so don't try anything, you hear?"

"Of course." Tobe said, glancing at Joren as if to say '_I'll find you later'._

Kel caught the look as well, and gave Joren a look of her own when Tobe left. Joren hadn't seen anyone look at him with so much contempt in quite a while, and was even tempted to look away. "I don't even want to know what you two found to talk about." Kel said finally. 

"We were talking about the Pride." Joren replied, watching her carefully for a response. She clenched her jaw, stiffened, and narrowed her eyes ever so slightly. "Of course, you know about that, don't you?" he prompted. 

"Actually, I don't, nor do I care to." Kel said matter-of-factly. "Now, can I get that empty tankard out of your way?" she asked with mock courtesy.

"Sure." Joren said, waving his hand at her irritably. 

Kel's disappearance left the young man with his own thoughts again. 

So, Keladry of Mindelan didn't want anything to do with the revolution. He wondered if she knew that many of her former comrades were still alive. Would she want to join them if she knew Queenscove, Goldenlake, the Lioness, and even the king were still alive and plotting the demise of the Empire?

Keladry was sharp, agile, and often praised by all the members of the Pride for her skills in command and battle. And though she was his foe of old, he knew they would all rejoice in the knowledge that she was alive and joining the cause. _The Pride needs a boost to morale that Mindelan just may be able to provide._

And how could he possibly get her to leave the security she has built here for a life of uncertainties and danger? 

Tobe, who was then tapping his shoulder, dragged him out of his thoughts once again. Joren smiled slightly at the curious boy. _Perfect._

* * * 

Kel splashed her face with the water from her wash basin, exhausted from a full night's work. It was now early morning, and she'd only have three or four hours of blesséd sleep before having to awaken again and serve breakfast. She changed into a nightgown and slipped into her small yet warm bed. Her tired muscles tingled from being so suddenly at complete rest. After serving the unusually large group of guests and dealing with the appearance of Joren of Stone Mountain, Kel was glad to put the entire day behind her. 

She was just thanking the gods that there were no shouting soldiers or noisy lovers in the rooms around or above hers on that particular knight when she heard a gods-cursed knock on her door.

"Hold on!" Kel shouted as she rose, draped a shawl over her shoulders, and lit a candle. The unwelcomed guest waited outside until she opened the door. Kel's eyes narrowed.

"Sorry to—" Joren began, before she attempted to slam the door in his face. He caught the door with a gloved hand before it closed completely. 

"Go away, I've got to get some sleep!" Kel said, forcing the door towards closing on his hand. Joren had to force his entire body mass into the crack before she sighed and permitted him to enter. 

"I've got to talk to you, Mindelan, it's important." Joren said finally, closing the door behind him. Kel sighed, lighting the torch in her room with her bedside candle.

"All right, but make it quick." Kel said with a sigh. 

"Fine, fine. It's about the Pride. How much do you know, exactly?"

"I know that it's a hopeless band of revolutionaries who are holding on to memories of a past that should be forgotten." Kel snapped. 

"Do you know exactly _who_ those revolutionaries are? Do you know who leads them?"

"No, not exactly, but—"

"Think about it. A Pride is the name for a pack of lions—and who's at the head of a pride of lions? A head lion and a—"

"Lioness." Kel breathed. "Do you mean to say that Alanna—"

"Is alive and working madly for the cause of Tortall? Yes, that's exactly what I mean. With Jonathan as her lion, no less. And they're flanked by Numair, Daine, Raoul, Buri, Thom, Roald, Faleron—even Queencove came from the Yamanis a year ago to join the cause."

Kel was shocked. "I—" she gulped. "I don't believe it."

"Believe me, it's true." 

"Well--" she grasped for some sort of defense against this disturbing knowledge. "Well how is it that you, who are more of a traitor then a knight, came to work for Tortall's cause with the greats of Jonathan's court?"

"Even people like me don't want to see Carthaki barbarians in power here. Tortall is a fraction of what it once was." Upon seeing Kel's dubious expression, he rolled up the cuff of his sleeve. Look, this is the brand of the lioness." He said, showing her the tiny black lioness tattooed on his wrist. "Why would I make this up?"

Kel, not wanting to believe that the world free of her past that she had so carefully rebuilt was crumbling around her, didn't want to join him. "I don't know, but even if it is true, I'm not going to join you."

"You can save Tortall, Mindelan!"

"Yeah?" Kel yelled. "Me and what army?" Silence then followed, as both Joren and Kel were somewhat shocked by the sudden outburst. Then, in a lower tone, she spoke again, "Tortall is lost, Stone Mountain." She said softly. "There's no use trying to revive something that's been dead for years."

"You've got nothing to lose." Joren replied. 

"But you're wrong." She told him. "I have _everything _to lose. See, I have a new life now. And the best thing about this new life is that _you're _not in it."

"So you're going to abandon Tortall—the Tortall you swore to serve for your _entire _life—for a live of mundane security in a world where you're in hiding? A world where you're a practically a prisoner, forced to deny that you were born into nobility?"

"I like my life right now, Joren! I have a job and a home that gives me a fien disguise and effortless safety, I have Tobe—and I'm going to be married to a wonderful man in less then a month. I'm happy, Joren, and I don't need you to remind me of all of _that_."

"So that's it, huh?" Joren spat back, obviously restraining himself physically. "You're just giving up on Tortall?"

"That's exactly it." Kel said angrily. "I'm glad I'm _finally _getting through to you."

Joren clenched his jaw, radiating anger. "I always knew you were a coward." He said bitterly, slamming the door to her room behind him as he left. 

Kel, who was still reeling from the shock of it all, fell onto her bed as she held back tears. Remembering Tortall as it had been was too painful, even if Neal and Raoul and all the other people she was sure she had lost were actually alive. The land was still plagued by quakes, famines, and storms. Dom was still gone, her family still lay in unmarked graves, and there was still no way Tarigue's enormous army would ever come to ruin in her lifetime. Kel had meticulously contructed a wall in her mind against all hope of change, and she had grown comfortable with it. 

Of course, that didn't stop Kel from wondering if she could find the spot, where, six years ago, she had buried her sword.

* * * 


	4. Losing Grip

A/N: Hey everyone. Ok, so I'm finally updating this fic, after months of inactivity. You all can thank **AlianneOfTortall **and her prodding for the update. This chapter is for her--and for my beta ThePenMage, who couldn't actually beta this chapter since she's away to celebrate her BIRTHDAY. HAPPY B-DAY, Farah! All the grammatical errors are solely my fault. Also—I have such trouble writing dialect—therefore, just assume that Kel, Elsie and Tobe have the accents of city-folk for this chapter in the fic, and excuse my poor attempt at giving them accents. – Thanks for reading! **Minerva**

Chapter 4: Losing Grip 

Kel yawned into her mug of tea as she sat at the kitchen table, wishing with all her heart that she were back in her bed. She was barely awake, exhausted to the core. Every inch of her body had protested against waking up that morning. 

"Finish up, Kel, we've gotta start servin' breakfast in a few minutes!" Elsie called to her from the stove. 

"Right." She said. Kel gulped down the rest of her tea, the warm liquid settling comfortably in her stomach. She set the mug in the washbasin, wiped her hands on her apron and pushed through the door to the serving bar. The main room was generally empty when Kel entered and unlocked the doors to the public, but today, someone was leaning in the farthest corner.

Kel squinted at the figure, seeing his navy blue tunic and blood red arm bands before she saw his face. She smiled as he stepped into the light, his gray eyes smiling back at her. 

"Rhoden." She said, unlocking the door to the guest hallway. "What are you doing here so early?"

"Came to see you, of course." He said, hugging her from behind. His deep voice bore traces of a Carthaki accent, though his speech was that of an educated officer. His black hair was shaved close to his head, complementing his handsome profile. "Listen, Kel, I want to show you something tonight. Should I ask Elsie if she will spare you for supper?"

"I'll ask 'er," Kel said, turning to face him. "You workin' today?"

Rhoden sighed deeply as she gently pushed him away and moved to unlock the main doors. "Yes, unfortunately," he said, following her around. "I'm training new recruits until the late afternoon down at the docks. Will you meet me there when you can?"

Kel stopped and looked at him suspiciously, noticing out of the corner of her eye that several guests were entering already. "What're you plannin' on showin' me, Capt'n?"

He grinned back at her, looking very pleased with himself. "It's a surprise."

Kel rolled her eyes. "All right, then." He was barely an inch taller then her, but his muscular broadness made her feel small and feminine. She smiled and kissed him quickly. "See you tonight."

He snaked an arm around her waist and pulled her in close to him, bringing his lips to hers to hold her in a longer, deeper kiss. "Tonight."

With that, he disappeared out through the door to the street. Kel pressed her fingertips to her lips as she watched his figure disappear. 

"You shouldn't have to deny who you are, Mindelan," a dry voice remarked from behind her. Kel turned, her eyebrows snapping together in irritation at the blond leaning against the wall a few feet behind her. 

"I don't believe I asked for your input," she growled.

"You might not have asked for it, but I'm here to give it to you." He said, crossing his arms across his chest. "I knew you were a coward, but a traitor?" He gave her a look of pure venom. 

"I am no traitor!" Kel replied, clenching her hands into tight fists. She kept her voice low so that she didn't attract any unnecessary attention. 

Joren snorted. "He's in the Carthaki Navy!" He whispered harshly. "He's a stupid barbarian!"

"You have no right to say such things about him!" Kel shot back. "I love him, and I'm going to marry him."

"You're a knight of Tortall, Mindelan, not some monkey man's wife!"

"Monkey man! You are the most bigoted asshole--" 

"You're _betrothed_ works for the man who killed your family and your friends!" Joren growled at her, grabbing her upper arm roughly as if to snap her into reality. "How can you live with yourself!"

Kel broke away from his hold and slapped him across the face. "Don't touch me!" she spat, her eyes shining with tears despite her efforts to keep a level head. 

Joren sighed and shook his head, ignoring his throbbing cheek and the stares of the few people in the main room. "I'm taking Tobe with me to Corus. I thought you might like to join us, but you're obviously too selfish to want to work for what they all died for."

That did it for Kel. She threw a punch straight at his right side before he could even blink and attacked him. She tackled him and pushed him to the floor, punching him wherever she could as he tried to defend himself from her frenzied attack. They tumbled around on the hardwood floor, knocking into several tables and chairs as they each struggled to gain the upper hand. Joren had just managed to pin her beneath him when Elsie's pudgy arms appeared and attempted to break them up.

Joren sprung to his feet, nursing his aching jaw as Elsie helped a groaning Kel get to her feet. The short innkeeper turned to him and waggled her think index finger at him. "Get outta 'ere, you ruffian! Stay 'way from my inn!"

"Ma'am—"

"What'd ye think ye were doin', raisin' a 'and to my girl 'ere!" she fumed, her thick accent barely understandable.

"I was defendin' myself, ma'am—" he began. 

"That the truth, Kel girl?" Elsie asked. Kel rolled her eyes and nodded. 

"He ain't worth the trouble, Elsie." Kel said, brushing past him towards the bar. "Now, we've got a breakfast t-serve, don't we?"

"That we do." Elsie said, glaring at Joren still. "You'll be payin' extra fer this." she warned Joren. Joren sighed and left the main room in search of his newest charge. 

He banged on Tobe's bedroom door as he wiped blood away from his nose. The door opened to reveal a frantic Tobe cramming things from all over the small room into a rug sack.

"Hurry up and get some breakfast, we've got a ship to meet."

"Where's Kel—" The boy asked, not looking up at Joren.

"I told her you were coming with me, so you don't have to bother with goodbyes," Joren growled. "I think she may have broken my nose."

Tobe's head jerked upward, taking in Joren's bloody handkerchief and tried not to laugh. "Kel did that, did she?" he asked. "She must have been angry."

Joren rolled his eyes. "Angry is an understatement." 

Tobe closed his rug sack and through it over his shoulder. He closed the door to his bedroom and sighed, pausing to look at Joren. "Are you sure she'll follow us, Stone Mountain?" he asked.

Joren paused, thinking. He was sure she would follow, before he saw her this morning with that _man_. He wasn't sure what to make of it. People did stupid things when they were in love. Joren strode on ahead of Tobe so that the boy wouldn't see the uncertainty in his eyes. 

"She will follow us." 

* * *

__

Is Tobe really leaving? She asked herself as she dodged huge puddles in the broken cobblestone streets of the city, on her way from the inn to the docks. Her heart constricted at the thought. Tobe was growing up to be a strong and able minded young man. He was passionate about restoring Tortall, and his youthful idealism could not be deterred by all of her cynicism. Kel pursed her lips together, remembering the days when she too, thought she could change the world.

She'd have to find Tobe when she returned to the inn and ask him about what Joren had mentioned that morning. She wasn't sure if she could bear parting with her young friend. She had _always _treated him like a little brother, and took as much care of him as a mother would. 

The city buzzed around her, though it had been left dim and blue-grey from the departed rainstorm of the night before. The grand, cobblestone streets that she vaguely remembered from her days as a knight were now left broken and uprooted from the quakes and floods that were frequent because of poor control of the Dominion Jewel. Kel had grown accustomed to it, but she still had to walk with care as she traveled around the city. 

The docks were the busiest place in the city. At this time in the afternoon, the smell of fresh fish mingled with the salty scent of the sea as fishermen tried to sell their goods. Kel would have to walk through the busy docks to get the beach where Rhoden would be training his men. She had changed into a simple, cream colored dress, unsure of what the surprise would hold for her.

Kel was almost at the end of the long stretch of seaside docks when a familiar face caught her eye. Tobe stood facing the ocean, waiting as a ship neared the dock. He had a stuffed rug sack at his side, obviously equipped for a long journey. And who was that with him…._Joren_? A sinking feeling settled in the pit of his stomach. So he _was _leaving. Without even saying goodbye to her? After all they had been through together—after everything she had done for him? He was just leaving?

She paused to look at her ward for a moment longer, took a deep breath, and continued on her way. _It's his life, and his choice, _she told herself. If he wanted to work for a hopeless cause, she would to longer try to stop him.

Nevertheless, by the time she reached the beach, she was nearly in tears. Rhoden was speaking with a younger man, obviously one of his recruits, but it seemed as if the training had been completed. The young recruit disappeared, and Rhoden jogged over to her. 

"'Lo there, Capt'n." Kel said, flashing him a shy grin. 

"Hello beautiful." He said, kissing her cheek and taking her hand. "You don't look to happy, what's wrong?"

Kel sighed. "Oh, it's Tobe," she said. "He's decided t'move 'imself t'Corus."

Rhoden's eyebrows rose. "That's interesting," he replied. "When is he thinking of going?"

"'E's on 'is way already." Kel said, pursing her lips. 

He whistled. "Mithros, that's sudden!" Kel looked down at her feet, not wanting to think about it, or explain what Tobe was going to do there. Rhoden sighed again. "I'm sorry, Kel."

Kel shrugged. "Tobe's grown now. It's 'is life, and I'm not gonna be the one t'stop him from doin' what 'e wants."

"That's right." Rhoden lifted his hand to her lips and kissed it. "Come with me, I have something that will cheer you up."

He led inland through the reeds that separated the beach from the rest of the land, and took her to a large house nearby. It was set on tall, sturdy cinderblocks to protect the actual house from flooding, and was built in the simple yet elegant Carthaki style. He led her up the stairs and around the back of the house on the wrap around veranda and stood looking out onto the water. Kel inhaled the fresh scent of the ocean and sighed. "Tis a lovely 'ouse, Rhoden." She said, setting her elbows on the sturdy wooden railing. "'ho lives 'ere?"

"We do," he said, glancing sideways at her. "I bought it yesterday."

Kel's eyes widened. "This is our 'ouse?" she gaped. Kel couldn't believe it. Rhoden had been living in the barracks, even though he was a captain, and she had been staying in a tiny room in the inn that was hardly as big as a noblewoman's closet. "This whole house, just for us?"

Rhoden nodded, obviously excited. "I was sure you'd like it."

Kel pursed her lips and looked out to the water again. The sun was beginning to set over the beach, and a reddish glow covered them both. A new city, a new house, a new love, a new life. This was what she wanted, wasn't it? Her old self wasn't a part of her. Even Tobe wasn't going to be around to remind her of the past that she had safely locked away. 

Joren's words echoed in her mind. _You're obviously too selfish to want to work for what they all died for._ She felt a pang of guilt, finding such happiness when they were all in their graves. 

Her heart felt heavy, but she finally responded. "I love it, Rhoden. I love it."

* * *

Tobe stared up into the sky from back of wagon, his legs casually dangling off the side as his horse Joren's horse and Tobe's own gelding, Fritz, trudged on towards Corus. They had been on the road for two days, and Joren had promised they would reach by nightfall. He wondered if Kel missed him, and if she would forgive him for what he had done.

"You're sitting on my skirts again." An irritated female voice sounded from above him. The young man sighed and moved an inch to the left without opening his eyes. He heard the girl let out an exasperated breath of air. "Well, if you aren't asleep, you should at least be polite and sit up."

"I'm _tryin' _to sleep, all right?" Tobe snapped, opening his eyes to look at Miss Cecilia Winthrop, daughter of Norman Winthrop and Rebecca of Goldenlake and honor student at the Imperial University of Carthak.

"You shouldn't sleep with your eyes turned up at the sun like that. It will damage them, you know," she told him.

Tobe rolled his eyes. "They're _closed_," he told her.

"Even so," she sniffed. "And you'll probably get sunburned as well. That can be very nasty business."

He sighed and looked up at her brother for sympathy. Unfortunately, the pale mage-in-training was dead asleep at his sister's side on the seat, unkempt black hair in a bush around his thin face. "Maybe your brother would benefit from your advice, Miss Winthrop. I think his skin would burn fair quicker than mine would," Tobe said.

The young woman shook her head and crossed her arms over her chest with a sigh. "You men never listen to what's best for you." Tobe rolled his eyes again and reverted to lying on his back with his eyes closed. He and Joren had picked up the two young students at the docks two days ago. When first introduced to Miss Cecilia Winthrop, Tobe had thought she was quite a sight to be seen. Her rosy-cheeked, pale face was the picture of beauty, and her green eyes were large and shapely. She had full, pink lips and her auburn colored hair was pulled up in an elegant twist. Though she barely reached his chin, she carried herself with such poise that she seemed as tall as Kel, and she was pure sophistication and composure. She looked priceless. She looked like the sort of girl he would give his life for in a heartbeat.

But as soon as she opened her mouth, Tobe's lofty perceptions of the girl came crashing to the ground. He found her snobbish, rude, and highly demanding. She was smart, and she knew as much. She was beautiful, but painfully conscious of it. Even her twin brother Roderick, who didn't look or seem related to her in the least, seemed to find her company tedious. 

Roderick was a scholarly mage type, the sort that looked as if he had never seen the sun. He was quiet but friendly, and seemed rather absent-minded. And all the while, Joren simply ignored them all from his perch at the head of the wagon.

All in all, it was not very engaging company. Tobe sighed, and hoped that Joren had been right in saying that Kel would join them soon.

* * * 

Rhoden took her for supper in the city, to a very nice tavern that many of the officers frequented. Kel had cheered up a bit, and spending time with her betrothed had gotten her mind off Tobe and Joren. They had just finished their meal and were getting up to leave when a dark man broke into Kel's line of vision. She recognized him as Rhoden's brother, Torson, also an officer, but of lesser ranking. He had proved himself a quiet, jealous man, and the look of outrage in his eyes at that particular moment disturbed them both. 

"You lying wench!" he accused in a loud voice, slamming his fist on their table. Kel backed away from him, confused. Rhoden held his brother away from her angrily, demanding an explanation. "She's not who she says she is!" Torson told his brother, clenching his jaw. 

"What in Mithros' name are you talking about?" Rhoden asked, eyes snapping furiously. Most of the people in Tavern had stopped their activities and were looking at the two brothers with curiosity.

"She's a noblewoman, Rhode!" he spat, not bothering to keep his voice down. Gasps broke out around her, but Kel refused to panic. "And not just any noblewoman," he continued. "She was a _knight_!" shouts of outrage resounded all around her. 

"Where did you get such nonsense!" Rhoden demanded, grabbing Torson by the collar.

"A man who knew her before the war told me as much. She is Keladry of Mindelan, lady knight of Tortall!"

Rhoden stared at Torson for a moment, anger pulsing through his veins. He roughly released his brother. "You forget your place, brother." He growled in Carthaki, pushing past Torson to take Kel's hand. He dragged her out of the tavern as the crowd around them hissed and booed at her. Kel was simply afraid for her own safety.

He released her hand when they were a safe distance from the tavern and stormed ahead of her. He was angry, that much was obvious. "Rhoden—" she began, her voice unimposing and calm. "I wanted to tell you, but—"

"So it's true, then." He said, turning to face her. 

Kel bit her lip, tears forming in her eyes. "I have a different life now. That isn't a part of me—"

"You lied to me!" He yelled. "You lied about everything!"

"I didn't have a choice! You would have hated me, shunned me!" she cried. "You would have killed me if you knew!"

"I am your betrothed, and you didn't trust me enough to tell me that you were nobility!" Rhoden continued, outraged. "And a knight! A knight, Kel?!"

"Rhoden, please, just listen—"

"And your accent! You're talking like a noble—and you pretended all this time! All this time, you pretended to support the revolution, my career, you pretended to be someone I could respect—"

"My past means nothing now!" 

Rhoden shook his head and lowered his voice. "I can't believe this."

"I am sorry, Rhoden. I am really sorry." She said, placing a hesitant hand on his shoulder. "I was afraid of what you would do if you found out."

He lifted a calloused hand to her face, wiping away a tear before giving her a tender kiss. "I would have been good to you, Kel." He said when he pulled away. 

"You will be—" Kel began, but Rhoden shook his head. 

"I can't," he said. "You're not who I thought you were, lady knight. And everyone will hunt you down—tear us apart." Kel let her eyes wander from his hairline to his strong chin, memorizing his face. This was it. This was the end. Everything she had woven was unraveling around her, and all she would have left by the end of it would be a past she had only wanted to forget. 

Rhoden dragged her from her thoughts, pressing a few gold nobles in her palm. "My brother won't rest until you are imprisoned. He takes his job even more seriously then I do. Take these and go to Corus. You will be forgotten here in time."

Kel wanted to protest, but her emotion was caught up in her throat. This wasn't fair! She couldn't rebuild her life again! She didn't have the strength to do this any more. He took her face in his hands, forcing her to look at him. "You leave right away, hear me? Find Tobe, live a new life."

She gulped and nodded, pocketing the coins. "I wish things had been different," she said. 

"I wish they had been too." He said finally. They stared at each other for a long time. "You should go now, Keladry of Mindelan, before I decide to do my duty as an officer and arrest you." 

She nodded. "Thank you." And with that, she turned and left her life in the dust.

* * *


End file.
